Skip to main content

Choosing Your Bridesmaids : 4 Tips to Keep it Stress Free!

A big part of your wedding and your wedding planning is the selecting bridal party - your maid of honor and your bridesmaids.  Choosing who will stand next to you on one of the most important days of your life can be a stressful decision.  You want to make sure that no one feels left out, but you also don't necessarily want that overly-dramatic friend (as much as you love her) to add stress to your big day.

We have put together some tips to help you choose your bridesmaids wisely!

1. Determine How Many Will Be in Your Wedding Party

How many bridesmaids should you have?  Although people have differing opinions on this subject, twelve is the limit.  It is important to include the people closest to you, but don't go overboard. You can always ask people to help with the wedding in other areas. 

A few tips to help keep the numbers down:

  • A good rule of thumb is to have one bridesmaid and one groomsman per every 50 wedding guests.  
  • The number of bridesmaids does not HAVE TO  match the number of groomsmen.  
  • Start with a list of all the important people in your life ... family and close friends, then narrow it down from there.  Keep in mind that groups of people who know each other may get along better, helping ease the stress you will already have from the other aspects of planning your wedding.
  • Simply because you were someone's bridesmaid five years ago, doesn't mean you have to call  that person you haven't talked to in several months and ask them to be a part of your wedding.       

2. Remember, Blood is Thicker Than Water

It's almost impossible to avoid family conflicts when it comes to planning a wedding and resolving them may not be the simplest task.  If you are close to your sister or future sister-in-law, its a no-brainer that she should be in the wedding party.  If your parents are paying for the event, they may have decided that your annoying little sister has to be your maid of honor. Sometimes it's just easier to keep the peace and have the family member by your side at the altar. Your friends can still be a part of everything and you can even consider increasing the size of your wedding party to please your family as well as yourself.

You do have to draw the line somewhere though; you can't be afraid to offend your second cousin on your step-dad's side by not asking her to be in your wedding.  Just remember, friends can come and go, but your family will always be there.

3. Make Sure They Can Handle Diva Duty

Consider all of the responsibilities of your bridesmaids before making any decisions.  You will have a lot to do before and on your wedding day. You want someone who can handle diva duty.

Bridesmaids Gifts
Personalized Totes Make Great Bridesmaids Gifts!
As an example, did your best friend just have a baby?  With a newborn, she would probably be relieved not to be your maid of honor and ,ay enjoy being able to sit back and enjoy this special day with her friend without all the behind the scenes stress.

Also consider where your bridesmaids live. Do you want help with writing out the invitations and organizing the favors and decorations?  Your best childhood friend that now lives 5 states away may not be your best option. This is your big day and you need all the help you can get to make it the special day you've always dreamed of.

4. Consider Money Pressures

Although being asked to stand next to your friend on her big day is an honor, it can also be a burden. Along with all the time devoted to making the wedding a success, money is also involved. Bridesmaid dresses aren't always the most affordable items.  

That said, don't assume and exclude a friend because you think she is going through a financial crisis.  Be up front with the anticipated expenses and let her know you would love for her to be a part of your wedding, but that if she's not up for it she can help in other ways.  Or if you can't stand the thought of not having her in your wedding, offer to help with the expenses.

Also, don't be offended if someone you expect to say yes, declines the offer; never take it personally. Chances are, something else is going on and its not a reflection of you.

Sometimes people accept a role in the wedding party (when they shouldn't) and then are unhappy with the costs and expectations; if this happens, get to the root of the problem early and see if you can work it out. 

Personalized Flip-Flops for Your Bridesmaids
Once you have your bridesmaids selected out, let everyone know your decision.  Make sure everyone is on the same page and be sure to have additional jobs picked out for those that didn't make the cut.  A true friend will understand your decision, and you can still make her feel special by having her greet and monitor the guest book as your wedding guests arrive or hand out programs prior to the ceremony.

Now you can check off that box next to "Select Bridesmaids" ... and now you have people to help you finish the rest of that endless wedding planning checklist!

~ The Team

Where brides go®  ... for what brides love!
Don't forget about our Coupon Code VIPBRIDE which saves you an additional 10% off your entire order at!!  We also offer FREE SHIPPING on all orders over $100 (continental US only).

Connect with online!
LIKE US on Google+


jude said…
Nice article to fine wedding planning ideas , well cool collection of images for beast plan wedding planner iphone app free , wedding vendors

Popular posts from this blog

5 of Our Favorite Gift Ideas For Your Groomsmen

Our last blog featured 5 of our favorite bridesmaid gifts to give the lovely ladies in your wedding party. Today... let's hear it for the boys! We can't leave those wonderful gentleman out that are standing up for the groom at your wedding. Today we're showing off 5 of the best groomsman gift ideas that you can find when you head on over to

Where ladies are often thrilled to get gifts that are pretty, men usually prefer something that they can use, or a novelty gift that brings a grin to their face. Not all groomsman are alike, so it's perfectly okay to get different thank you presents for each one. Let the gift reflect the friendship between him and the groom. A nice bonus when you shop at our online wedding accessory store is that nearly every item can be personalized. There's a lot to pick from , but here are 5 of our favorite ideas to get you started. 

Beverage Containers
Raising a toast to your new marriage is a lot more fun with special, perso…

5 of Our Favorite Gift Ideas For Your Bridesmaids

Those wonderful women that will be standing at the altar next to you while you say "I do" to your groom are very special people. If they weren't, they wouldn't be in that honorable position. One way to show them how thankful you are is by finding the best bridesmaid gifts that they can treasure after your wedding day. You can find pages full of wonderful gift ideas for your bridesmaids at, but here are 5 of our favorite ideas to get you started. 

You can save your bridesmaids the expense of having to buy jewelry to match their gowns by giving it to them as a gift. This will also be a marvelous keepsake that they can wear after the wedding day too. We offer an incredible selection of beautiful jewelry in our online wedding accessory store, and best of all, most pieces can be personalized. 

Jewelry Boxes
Something that can also be useful for them on a daily basis is always a good idea. Something pretty to keep all of their jewelry would be perfect…

5 Gorgeous Wedding Trends For 2018

One of our favorite things to find out when a new year rolls around is what types of items that brides and grooms will favor for the coming wedding season. Trends pop up every year, some brand new but often just a unique twist on a classic look, and has a few trends featured in today's blog that we expect to see used quite often this year. Our online wedding accessory store is a great place to find many of them!     

Woodsy is the New Rustic
Rustic weddings will never go out of style, but where lots of burlap and lace was the way to do it in the past, couples will be incorporating a lot more wooden elements into this type of wedding theme in 2018. There is a lovely many lovely ways to use wood in different areas of your wedding decor, and a woodgrain pattern would even look wonderful on your stationery.   

Wooden items look gorgeous on their own, and slabs of wood make excellent accent pieces for holding up centerpieces or wedding cupcakes. Winery weddings are anoth…